All of us experience grief or will at some point within our lifetime. There have been books written by highly intelligent people on how to offer sympathy to someone who has suffered a major loss. These so-called experts believe they have mastered the art of condolence, trying to best advise us on what to say or write to the grieving person.
Ever since the internet became a popular tool of communications, proper messages seem to have disappeared for the most part. Many of us would buy sympathy cards at the drugstore to help convey our thoughts in a delicate manner to serve as our voice. Even buying cards has become a thing of the past or outdated, if you will. These days, young people might send a message of sympathy without a stamp, over the social media page, with a sad emoji, like a crying face or a broken heart.
To some, internet sympathy messages might seem tacky and improper, but there are a few folks left with sensitive souls who write beautiful words of heartfelt expression. One elderly man authored a note of sympathy to a stranger online. The gentleman happens to read the online publication and goes under the name GSnow.
Another reader there had posted a question to the popular publication, saying their best friend had just died. They said, “I just don’t know what to do.”
GSnow had been there numerous times and had plenty to say about the subject of love and dying, and he shared his intelligent thoughts with this grieving reader and the world. Readers responded, applauding him for his sensitivity and poignant remarks.
GSnow’s lengthy response with advice begins telling the grieving reader that it’s all about survival. He lists a few of the many persons he has lost over the years, saying that each loss pierces a hole in his heart, and then, deep scars begin to form. The scars, however, are a necessary result, because scar tissue grows very strongly and enables you to heal. Some might view scars as ugly, but GSnow says “Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can’t see.”
When you experience loss, you are shipwrecked, GSnow continues. If you can float upon a happy memory and remember the beauty of the person and their time on earth, then that is another aspect of survival. It might take months on those strong seas, where you continue to float and feel. One day, you notice the huge waves are a bit lower; you’re still soaking wet, but you can deal with the depths of your despair. You are going to be alright and that these shipwrecks will happen along the journey of life. As you get older, you might not always understand these losses, but you learn to accept them.